Monday, December 28, 2009
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Its finally starting to feel like christmas for me over here in little old NZ.
The weather is hot and sunny. Today is christmas eve and I think most people have already escaped Auckland for summer baches down the coast, and so driving around feels like of nice instead of the usual stress it is on the average day.
after visiting some old workmates (who were the skeleton crew on, dressed in shorts and jandals and looking pretty casual) at one of my old haunts I stopped at the supermarket to get some food for the christmas lunch we are having at work.
The place was PACKED.
It took me 43 minutes of waiting in a queue to finally get to the checkout (might I add, busting to go to the loo so it felt more like 1 hr and 43 minutes). But the mood was kinda cheery with everyone in the line chatting away, telling of their christmas plans and generally just being good spirited. The food in everyone's trolleys looked so good. King prawns, cherries, punnets of strawberries exploding everywhere, cheeses and crackers and not to mention old favourites at christmas like christmas pies, cakes and champagne!
Work is busy busy busy, with lots of people (the ones still left in Auckland that is) coming in and getting what books there ARE left on the shelves - which is actually not much now, we are down the dregs - to take away with them over the christmas new years period.
For me I only get 4 days off but wow I'm looking forward to them!
Merry christmas everyone! Hope you have a wonderful break.
The weather is hot and sunny. Today is christmas eve and I think most people have already escaped Auckland for summer baches down the coast, and so driving around feels like of nice instead of the usual stress it is on the average day.
after visiting some old workmates (who were the skeleton crew on, dressed in shorts and jandals and looking pretty casual) at one of my old haunts I stopped at the supermarket to get some food for the christmas lunch we are having at work.
The place was PACKED.
It took me 43 minutes of waiting in a queue to finally get to the checkout (might I add, busting to go to the loo so it felt more like 1 hr and 43 minutes). But the mood was kinda cheery with everyone in the line chatting away, telling of their christmas plans and generally just being good spirited. The food in everyone's trolleys looked so good. King prawns, cherries, punnets of strawberries exploding everywhere, cheeses and crackers and not to mention old favourites at christmas like christmas pies, cakes and champagne!
Work is busy busy busy, with lots of people (the ones still left in Auckland that is) coming in and getting what books there ARE left on the shelves - which is actually not much now, we are down the dregs - to take away with them over the christmas new years period.
For me I only get 4 days off but wow I'm looking forward to them!
Merry christmas everyone! Hope you have a wonderful break.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Being the secondary parent
When ZJ was first born and Simon went back to work, I was the primary caregiver - I knew everything that was going on with him. I would record all of the amounts of formula he was drinking in my diary, know exactly how long he had slept for, how many dirty nappies he had and when he did something new.
Just after ZJ turned 3 months old and my maternity payments dried up, Simon and I swapped places so that he became the primary caregiver and I went back to work. This decision was made for a few reasons - 1. I earned more. Alot more...enough to live off one income. 2. Simon hated his job whereas I loved mine, and 3. Because we wanted to have a stay at home parent instead of putting the babe in daycare, those other two reasons just fit together and made sense with this one.
It was bizarre at first. I was the baby expert. I did the research, knew what, where how and when with ZJ and had gotten him into a fantastic routine. Simon had always been a hands on dad - especially the first couple of weeks when i was recovering from my labour AND c section so he wasn't a complete noob, infact he was quite a natural at it, but I think swapping places was hard on us both to begin with.
I felt horridly guilty for going back to work so soon, even with Simon staying home. It didnt help that i was constantly bullied for that (and my non breastfeeding decision of course) by all the crunchy parents i have contact with during the day. It seems crunchy parenting is the new black and god forbid if you are not one of the crowd.
Self confidence wise it caught me off guard alot too. As the 'Mum' i feel its my duty to know every single detail if ZJ's day and i feel odd that I don't. I feel as the 'Mum' i should be the primary caregiver and be the expert on my child. So it feels bizarre when i say to Simon 'Should I put him down for a nap?', or 'Is it ok to feed him this now?' and 'what do you think I should do?'. It goes against all my instincts and feelings and i hated not being in control.
Then there is also the problem of lack of sleep for me. Just because Simon is the primary caregiver doesn't mean he has 'mommy ears'. If ZJ even makes a snuffle I am wide awake. It got better when he moved to his own room and when we put the baby monitor on a little quieter... but it can still cause problems.
Nowadays though, it all runs pretty smoothly. We have a good routine set and we stick too it. It makes us all happy and feel secure I think.
Simon is a fantastic stay at home dad and its obvious he loves it. He doesn't mind the lack of adult company - which is good considering there are not too many stay at home dad groups - infact i think he kind of thrives on it. He actually worried about me changing my mind and wanting to swap again I think. I thrive at work, I enjoy going every day, growing my career and doing something new. I enjoy the special time i get with my son when i get home and the last feed of the day (most of the time, when ZJ is cooperating :P) when i get to snuggle with him before he goes to sleep. On weekends we usually let each other have a sleep in day and it gives me time to spend with my son as well, or recoup from the business if its my turn.
I know it wouldn't of worked for us if I had continued to stay home or if we both worked full time (i think we would be far too exhausted to enjoy life) and I'm glad we broke out of the norms and did something a little different as the results have been so so worth it.
Just after ZJ turned 3 months old and my maternity payments dried up, Simon and I swapped places so that he became the primary caregiver and I went back to work. This decision was made for a few reasons - 1. I earned more. Alot more...enough to live off one income. 2. Simon hated his job whereas I loved mine, and 3. Because we wanted to have a stay at home parent instead of putting the babe in daycare, those other two reasons just fit together and made sense with this one.
It was bizarre at first. I was the baby expert. I did the research, knew what, where how and when with ZJ and had gotten him into a fantastic routine. Simon had always been a hands on dad - especially the first couple of weeks when i was recovering from my labour AND c section so he wasn't a complete noob, infact he was quite a natural at it, but I think swapping places was hard on us both to begin with.
I felt horridly guilty for going back to work so soon, even with Simon staying home. It didnt help that i was constantly bullied for that (and my non breastfeeding decision of course) by all the crunchy parents i have contact with during the day. It seems crunchy parenting is the new black and god forbid if you are not one of the crowd.
Self confidence wise it caught me off guard alot too. As the 'Mum' i feel its my duty to know every single detail if ZJ's day and i feel odd that I don't. I feel as the 'Mum' i should be the primary caregiver and be the expert on my child. So it feels bizarre when i say to Simon 'Should I put him down for a nap?', or 'Is it ok to feed him this now?' and 'what do you think I should do?'. It goes against all my instincts and feelings and i hated not being in control.
Then there is also the problem of lack of sleep for me. Just because Simon is the primary caregiver doesn't mean he has 'mommy ears'. If ZJ even makes a snuffle I am wide awake. It got better when he moved to his own room and when we put the baby monitor on a little quieter... but it can still cause problems.
Nowadays though, it all runs pretty smoothly. We have a good routine set and we stick too it. It makes us all happy and feel secure I think.
Simon is a fantastic stay at home dad and its obvious he loves it. He doesn't mind the lack of adult company - which is good considering there are not too many stay at home dad groups - infact i think he kind of thrives on it. He actually worried about me changing my mind and wanting to swap again I think. I thrive at work, I enjoy going every day, growing my career and doing something new. I enjoy the special time i get with my son when i get home and the last feed of the day (most of the time, when ZJ is cooperating :P) when i get to snuggle with him before he goes to sleep. On weekends we usually let each other have a sleep in day and it gives me time to spend with my son as well, or recoup from the business if its my turn.
I know it wouldn't of worked for us if I had continued to stay home or if we both worked full time (i think we would be far too exhausted to enjoy life) and I'm glad we broke out of the norms and did something a little different as the results have been so so worth it.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Learning new tricks
ZJ has been pulling himself up onto his knees for basically as long as he could crawl. But yesterday he figured out getting onto his feet means his reach for things on the coffee table/bookshelf/TV stand etc etc was just so much better.
It amazes me how quickly these little creatures learn a new trick. One day they will be like, 'nah can't be bothered with that rubbish' and then the next they will be 'please, i mastered that hours ago, onwards!'.
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Some people in the world just make me lol
Before you read the rest of this post, please watch this video:
Right, so what did you get from that?
Expected sappy blah that jewelery ads usual are right?
I kinda went 'awe' but I was in a sappy kind of mood at the time. I thought the dude saying i love you to his wife of the table and the look on her face was kinda sweet and the guy feeding his bub in the rocking chair...well I think there is nothing hotter than i guy feeding a baby but that is just me and well... i digress.
The reason this video came to my attention was that it was featured on the Fearless Formula Feeder blog... because some lactavist over at BirthActivist had had a bit of a fit over it. "...I was outraged within seconds when it showed a mom leaning over an empty crib while dad bottle fed a baby in the background. I mean come on, wouldn’t it be better to give mom a diamond for breastfeeding? Or even as a push present? But this was just sad. If you’re as outraged as I am, you can write them..." she wrote.
Uhm, lolwut?
I mean seriously you guys, there is being passionate about breastfeeding, and there is being a bit of a nazi about it too, but really... this just goes to a whole other level. This is just kinda crazy in my eyes. Over all the crap (and there is alot of it, even i have to admit that) you can get upset about Lactavists, this isnt it.
I was so glad to see no one really backed her up on this rant.
But i put it out to the world, what did you get from that ad? Did you think it was worth getting upset about? Do yuo think we SHOULD jump on ads like this more or do you think people need to settle down a bit and just see the ad for what it is...advertising?
Right, so what did you get from that?
Expected sappy blah that jewelery ads usual are right?
I kinda went 'awe' but I was in a sappy kind of mood at the time. I thought the dude saying i love you to his wife of the table and the look on her face was kinda sweet and the guy feeding his bub in the rocking chair...well I think there is nothing hotter than i guy feeding a baby but that is just me and well... i digress.
The reason this video came to my attention was that it was featured on the Fearless Formula Feeder blog... because some lactavist over at BirthActivist had had a bit of a fit over it. "...I was outraged within seconds when it showed a mom leaning over an empty crib while dad bottle fed a baby in the background. I mean come on, wouldn’t it be better to give mom a diamond for breastfeeding? Or even as a push present? But this was just sad. If you’re as outraged as I am, you can write them..." she wrote.
Uhm, lolwut?
I mean seriously you guys, there is being passionate about breastfeeding, and there is being a bit of a nazi about it too, but really... this just goes to a whole other level. This is just kinda crazy in my eyes. Over all the crap (and there is alot of it, even i have to admit that) you can get upset about Lactavists, this isnt it.
I was so glad to see no one really backed her up on this rant.
But i put it out to the world, what did you get from that ad? Did you think it was worth getting upset about? Do yuo think we SHOULD jump on ads like this more or do you think people need to settle down a bit and just see the ad for what it is...advertising?
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